by rick_patterson | Jan 17, 2021 | Courage, Psychology, Shame, Suicide
Suicide: the Hidden Time Bomb I just went to a funeral for a young man who had just graduated college and was preparing to begin his adult life. He committed suicide. Like with many suicides, his family and friends were left uttering the words “we had no idea”. What...
by rick_patterson | Feb 15, 2020 | Apology, Psychology, Shame
Apologizing is key to defeating shame. The apology is a powerful tool in the arsenal in the war against shame. In fact, apologizing defeats shame. If you’ve followed my work, you know I call the apology the nuclear option in the war against shame. However, accepting...
by rick_patterson | Sep 9, 2019 | Psychology, Shame
Shame seems like it’s your ally – when your feelings are hurt, it will come to your rescue Shame’s primary goal is to “protect” you from getting your feelings hurt. As soon as your feelings are hurt, shame will come to the rescue to offer...
by rick_patterson | Mar 31, 2019 | Christianity, Psychology, Shame, Spirituality
I’ve spent years in Christian training and ministry. As such, I’m often asked about the relationship between Christianity and shame. Ultimately, this relationship boils down to the cross. What did it mean? Why did it happen? What does it say to us? How did...
by rick_patterson | Oct 20, 2018 | Growth, Narcissism, Psychology, Shame
I am Rev. Dr. Rick Patterson and I’m a narcissist. More accurately, I’m a recovering narcissist. There was an article in Psychology today[1] with the headline “Empathy, the Ability that Makes us Truly Human”. As a shame researcher myself, I generally agree. It’s also...
by rick_patterson | Nov 16, 2017 | Christianity, Psychology, Shame, Success
Narcissism brings pain to many Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm– but the harm does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the...
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